Fortunes and Futures Part 1

About one week after Solal weekend, Seung Ah took me to my first fortuneteller! I’ve always wanted to go to one, but I’ve never had enough money and was always wondering whether it was worth it. This experience was very interesting. He wasn’t a fortuneteller per se, instead he did Chinese fortunetelling which is basically mathematical. He asked for my date and time of birth and with that gave me information about my past, my present and my future.

I’ll let you decide whether he’s any good. Here are his predictions about me.

My Past:

- He thought I moved or changed jobs in 2005
- I haven’t had a boyfriend since 2005
- I started to try to make money on my own since 2002 and I didn’t have any real financial trouble
- The financial trouble I perceived I had stemmed from the fact that I was unwilling to accept help from my parents so that’s why I struggled
- I had some trouble in 2006
- I was fated to leave my home in Haiti
- I have had bad luck with men

Who I am/My Present:

- I’m good at managing and teaching; I’m good at conveying information to others
- I have a hard time getting close to men
- I have a strong sense of justice, but society has a hard time following me
- I have a strong personality and I need to control my environment
- I don’t want to have children unless I’m in a stable relationship
- I’m more interested in happiness than in money
- My luck is described by two seasons: Summer and Spring
o Positive, active personality
- I’m eager to learn and to work
- When I meet a guy, I push him away, that’s why it’s difficult for me to be in a serious relationship
- Being a teacher is a good job for me


My Future:

- I won’t have a boyfriend in 2007, but my luck with men will slowly improve in the coming years
- I’ll meet a new group of people this year
- I’ll be studying and will keep learning things for the rest of my life but I won’t get any recognition for it from outside sources
- In 2008-2009 I’ll have a good man and boyfriend in my life, but it will only last for two years
- In 2012-2013 I will meet the man of my life and will ‘marry’ him (keep in mind that in Korea, living with someone implies that you are married because it is not acceptable to live with someone without being married)
- The boyfriends I will have in the future will be friends who will develop into more because I have a hard time getting close to men
- I’ll be traveling a lot in my life; journalism is a good job for me; I’ll never stay in one place for long
- I’ll be changing jobs every 2-3 years because it is what I will wish to do
- I’ll have financial luck in the future
- By the age of 40, I’ll be dissatisfied with my job and will have many offers with different companies that I will refuse because they will not mirror the kind of life I will want
- I will have kids, but I won’t want to depend on men
- I’ll have some problems with my colon and my joints and lungs, but nothing serious
- I’ll be traveling my whole life
- I’ll live a long life

So guys, what do you think? The only extra information I gave him about him was the fact that I came from Haiti. I also objected to his statement about my finances in my past. I found that a lot of the things he told me about my past were not accurate and I told him that I did have financial trouble and that’s when he added the bit on how it was because I refused help from my parents. He also knew that I teach here and that I want to be a journalist, but I didn’t tell him about all the traveling I’ve done nor about the traveling I wish to do in the future.

I didn’t tell him a word about me and my relationships so that came purely from him.

It was quite interesting all in all. I’m not sure I felt as though he was the real deal, but to be fair, he wasn’t quite the fortuneteller with a glass ball etc. He used the Chinese astrology counting system so he did a whole bunch of calculations and this is a field that people study, not that they are naturally born with. In addition, the fortunetelling was done in a brightly lit café where people order drinks and chat with chill music in the background…not at all the dark dingy little corner room I was expecting. I know, I know, I’m a bit on the overly creative side of things.

So I leave it up to you to decide what you think of what he said based on what you know about me. Seung Ah will take me to a palm reader she knows in the near future. I’m curious to compare both people’s prognoses about me. How similar or how completely different will they be? In addition, I’d be really interested in delving into the more obscure and naturally psychic world of fortunetelling to see what those people, with the natural talent, will have to say about me. Are they mind readers, do they really sense something from another world? Are they pulling things out of their asses? What’s the deal? I hope you enjoyed my little experiment. Tune in next time for Part 2 of Fortunes and Futures.

Love,

L

Solal Weekend - February 2007

It has been an eternity, I know. I apologize. I would like to announce that I bought my first computer about a month ago and I’m extremely proud of myself. This is the first time I have been able to purchase something such as this with my own hard earned money. I have arrived! I am an adult! Yeehah!

So I write this on my new HP laptop and it is sweet. It took me a while to get down to the nitty gritty of writing this because I had a computer but no Microsoft Office which I have just recently acquired. Goodbye Notepad!

The subjects of interest this time around will give you an overload of cool stuff to digest. As most of you know, the Lunar New Year usually occurs around February of every year. My Korean students all looked at me quizzically when I asked them what they planned to do for the Chinese New Year. They didn’t know what I was talking about. You see how we Westerns are so ignorant in so many ways? What was I doing saying the "Chinese New Year"? It’s the Lunar New Year and yet in the west we merely associate it to China because we know more about their culture and Japan’s than any other culture in Asia. In Korea, it is called Solal and we got to have a four day weekend.

I hadn’t had any intellectual stimulation for a while at that point and decided to get my act together and do something different. I booked a tour for the DMZ (demilitarized zone) which separates North Korea from South Korea. It was a half-day tour instead of the full-day I had initially wanted, but interesting nonetheless.

To be honest, I had expected to get to the point where you see the South Korean and North Korean guards staring each other down. I was not able to get as close as that. We were actually fairly far away from North Korea and could only catch a glimpse of it in the distance. The experience here was not so much seeing North Korea, but rather all the lengths both governments go through to kind of keep you away from North Korea. I have thought somewhat seriously about visiting North Korea, under no illusions about how controlled the visit would be. I was naïve, however, about the DMZ trip. I thought that by being on the South Korean side things would be a bit more lax. I suppose that, in theory, this is true however things were so incredibly restricted that many times we were wondering what we could possibly take pictures of that would be compromising.

Let me breakdown the weekend for you. The holiday lasted from Friday the 16th of February to Monday the 19th of February included. On that Friday morning I had to wake up at 6:30 to get to the pick-up spot for my DMZ trip. We drove roughly an hour north of Seoul and stopped at an area where the Freedom Bridge is located. This is a bridge that used to be the only access road between North and South Korea. At the end of this bridge is a fence where Koreans and foreigners alike have posted notes of peace and love in light of the situation between the two sides of this divided nation. Under the bridge was a little park where people could sit. In the distance we could see that a family had set up a shrine to which they were praying. The tour guide mentioned that many families would come here to pray for displaced or missing family members from the Korean War. In addition, Solal is the period in the year when people honor the family members who have passed away. This holiday, along with Chuseok, is the most important in terms of family gatherings.

After the Freedom Bridge, we went to an area where we saw a video about the divided nation. It was so commercial and so ‘Western’ that I had no doubts the Americans had helped them develop the video. It was a bit on the cheesy side, to be honest. We then walked through an area where we could read about different situations that had occurred between the two Koreas, the conflicts and plots the North Korean government had to build and eventually attack and overtake South Korea through a series of tunnels. Four tunnels have been discovered up to today, the most recent having been discovered less than ten years ago. People have no idea how many other tunnels may exist. We had an opportunity to go down into one of the tunnels but we couldn’t take any pictures. You could see holes in the walls from dynamite which had been set off to create the tunnel. It was wet and cold down there and fairly interesting.

After the tunnel, we went to Dorasan, a mountain that overlooks North Korea. There was a beautiful view and we had a soldier give us a little presentation. We were not allowed to take pictures from inside, but could from the balcony. But, there is a catch. You could only take pictures from behind the yellow line. You guys, the yellow line was about 5 meters behind the edge of the balcony. It was a joke! The only thing you can see from there is the North Korean mountain range. It was so funny that I took a picture of the line so that you could get an idea how ridiculous it was. But again, that’s part of the experience.

After Dora Mountain, we went to Dora Station, the last train station in South Korea, which in theory should connect both parts of the country if and when they are ready to re-merge. The station is beautiful, but empty. It’s pretty useless for the moment. Over there is a picture of the former South Korean president and President Bush who are both inaugurating the station. I took a picture of that picture. Look closely at it, there is something odd in the picture. I look forward to getting news from you to see who has found the oddity.



The next day, I met up with one of the guys from the tour and one of the teachers from YBM and we went to see an awesome traditional sport: Ssirreum, Korean style wrestling. It was really interesting. An interesting and strange thing: the wrestling is separated into only two weight categories: under 100kgs and over 100kgs. So you ended up seeing someone who was 110kgs wrestling against someone who was 160kgs. That’s a huge difference! An interesting twist to Korean wrestling is that each player has a piece of twisted cloth that is wrapped around his waist and thigh. The opposing player can use only that twisted cloth to throw his opponent. This means that they cannot touch their opponent with their hands. They are required to hook their hands in the cloth and hold on to that and to use that grip to throw his opponent down. This is a very difficult system and it was really cool to watch. There was entertainment between each set where North Korean dancers performed for the audience. It was interesting to see and listen to traditional North Korean entertainment. There was a particular dance called the 4 Seasons where the women changed the colors of their clothes in front of our eyes! I know that there is an explanation to it all, but they would go behind a wall of girls and come back out in different colors. I don’t know how they managed.

At the end of the competition, the winner received some money and a traditional gift, a cow. In the past, cows were given to the winners. Normally the winner would ride on the cow but seeing as this was a calf, he couldn’t possibly do that. He was placed on a throne and was carried around by six high school boys who were very obviously suffering from the weight. It was pretty cute, actually. They were so out of it!

After the competition, Seung Hyon and I went to meet up with some of the other girls at Doksu Palace, another one of the oldest palaces located in Seoul, where we hung around. Afterwards, we went to have dinner in Itaewon (the foreign neighborhood), where we dined at a nice Thai restaurant. Some of them had never eaten Thai before. It was a success. After dinner, we went to Namsan Tower, the Korean equivalent of the CN Tower or the tower in Seattle. We took a cab up the mountain and it was all lit up. The lights were changing on the tower and it was absolutely beautiful. We watched the view from the top of this mountain and it was priceless.



All of Seoul was spread out before us and we could see the Han River weaving through the multi-colored lights. Afterwards we walked down to the spot where we were to take the cable car down the mountain and we walked by something quite fascinating. You know the smoke signal system from Lord of the Rings? Well, Korea had the same system in the past. They had a set of smoke signals spread throughout the country for the same reasons. I took a picture of the historical information about that. You can read it if you’d like.

So that was my Solal weekend! Enjoy the pictures on Kodak Gallery!

March and April: Spring Fever

The month of March was a busy one, filled with work and a sense that things were just going from bad to worse. Throat infections have emerged, relationships have disintegrated and the pace of life has become work, home, sleep, work, home, sleep. Quite the monotonous lifestyle. My first four months here were pure heaven, typical of travels. I’ve experienced this in almost every new place I’ve been to. 2006, a year which had been so unhappy for me, seemed to end on a beautiful note. I had a new country, culture and language to sharpen my teeth on and my experiences continued to be beautiful. I maintain those impressions of Korea.

Of course, it is not perfect. There are aspects to the culture that I think I will always have a hard time dealing with. Those include the incredible rudeness people display in crowds. Apologies are non-existent 95% of the time so you just have to bite your lip and move on. Though in the West I would immediately demand an apology, regardless of the person’s age if they pushed me or cut me off in line, here I’m learning to keep my mouth shut and it is a difficult lesson for me to learn. I don’t want to be the abrasive foreigner who comes to a new country and expects everybody to be and act the way I do. The Koreans themselves don’t say anything when these things happen to them so I follow their example, though it pains me to do it.

I have, however, started to put my foot down when it comes to my apartment building. When people make too much noise after midnight on a weekday and that noise continues for long periods of time, I have decided to knock on their doors and ask them to keep it down. They don’t often open their doors, but they keep it down afterwards. That’s all I want, really.

But I think that this problem stems from an immense city with a large population. Saying sorry to strangers seems to be too much to ask because that would mean that you would have to constantly apologize and I definitely think that Confucious had a say in this attitude as well, especially when regarding how the elders treat younger people.

As I’ve mentioned before, however, once you get to know these people, they make a 180 degree change. They become the sweetest and most generous people I’ve ever met. It is a strange and sometimes confusing country to live in. But I don’t regret a minute of it.

Interestingly enough, my biggest issues and problems here have revolved around, not the Koreans, but the foreigners. I have had more drama in one month with foreigners than I have had in 8 months with Koreans. Yes, that’s right. I’m in my 8th month here. Crazy, right? Time flies.

I never thought about it in quite this way before, but in the end, most relationships have a shelf life. I had made some friends with whom I thought I’d be close and form a strong bond. But each of those relationships reached their expiration dates, much to my dismay and I had to re-evaluate my status here.

I have been able to count on the Korean women at work. They are awesome. We go out to see movies together. We have lunches and dinners and last weekend, we even went to Yoido, an island on the Han River where the cherry blossoms are in bloom. It was a beautifully sunny and warm day and we strolled along the avenue taking pictures of these trees. We then went to have lunch together followed by some frozen yogurt in yet another part of Seoul. It’s such a huge city!

And though I love these friends, there is a point which you cannot cross. The kind of intimacy of conversation that I was able to have with my friends in the West, I cannot have here. There are some invisible barriers that are erected that are not wise to cross. When people have problems here, they tend to keep it to themselves. When they talk about relationships, they give the absolute minimum information and then the conversation is over. And you know how talkative and analytical I am. I need to talk things to death in order to deal with problems. These are the types of issues I’ve been dealing with. Nothing too serious, but a definite sense of solitude that I will have to adjust to. Traveling is wonderful. Exploring a new world is pure magic, but along with those wondrous experiences also come the more sobering aspects of adjusting to a culture not your own. It is a humbling experience that never fails to keep me on the right track.

But separate from the challenges of a new cultures are the challenges that people face around the world, in any situation, at any time. And that is the shelf life theory of relationships.

A person recently told me that he no longer wanted to know me. He merely crossed me off his list. This is the first time anyone has ever wanted to eliminate me from their lives in such a way. It was a very difficult thing to swallow. I started to question myself as a result of his words. I was in shock, wondering how someone could think that I’m such a bad and mean person that they would not want me in their lives anymore. A friend gave me a figurative slap in the face. He became almost impatient with me as he told me that I should not even question my worth or myself as a person. And he’s right. He was part two of my wake-up call. Part one was a lovely Australian friend who let me ramble on until there were no more words. And he reassured me that my honesty, though perhaps a bit difficult to hear at times, is what makes me the person that I am. I have never hidden who I am. I am an open book and those that choose to ignore that side of me will do so to their detriment. I have nothing to apologize for. I have never set out to hurt others and that is a creed that I have promised to uphold. When someone asks for the truth, they must be prepared to hear my version of it as I must be when I ask it of others. So, I have to thank these lovely people in my life; people with whom I see no expiration date: thanks to Ben and Steve.

It is always a humbling experience when others indicate that their ideas of your worth fall far below your own perceptions of your worth. It is definitely important to listen to others and try to understand peoples’ reasons for acting in certain ways. It is also important to determine whether these words are words that you hear repeatedly from others. If they are, this is a reason for pause, but if those words are unique and negative and don’t represent a general impression of what others consider you to be, you must gather your wits about you and maintain your dignity and the trust that you have in yourself. Pain, as difficult as it is to believe at the time of infliction, does fade and we must take that to build upon and learn from.

This is undoubtedly an unusual entry. I have turned the camera away from the country and onto to me. I promise, it shall not always be this way.

Keep reading, I’ve got lots more to say about this fascinating country in upcoming entries.

Love,

L